My dear reader,

This morning I went to pilates.
Then I wandered into the park near my flat. Feeling good, even was inspired and recorded a reel.
Breathing. Pausing.

But then… procrastination kicked in.
Singing sad 2000s songs like they could fix me.
Wiping down my counters instead of opening my laptop.
Craving chocolate.
Getting snappy at nothing.
And now — just staring at my bed, wishing I could curl up, shut the shutters, and disappear.

It’s wild how one text can flip me — from fine, to catastrophizing.
From angry, to crying.
From “I’m okay,” to “please just hold me.”
That’s PMS.

^{What is PMS?}

Premenstrual Syndrome: the cluster of symptoms that can hit in the week or so before your period: mood swings, irritability, bloating, brain fog, exhaustion, cravings. Basically, your hormones are shifting gears and your brain chemistry is along for the ride.

Here’s how our cycle works in short:

Women’s cycle runs in phases, not just “period or not.”

• Menstrual phase - winter (bleeding): hormones are low, energy is low.

• Follicular phase - spring (the rebuild): estrogen rises, mood lifts, energy grows.

• Ovulatory phase - summer (the peak): you’re social, magnetic, strong — estrogen and testosterone are high.

• Luteal phase - autumn (the dip): progesterone rises, then drops. This is PMS territory. The nervous system gets more sensitive. Emotions heighten. Cravings and fatigue hit.

Here’s the gold for you: understanding these phases can change everything. If you know which season of the cycle you’re in and the women in your life are are moving through, you’ll better understand her energy, emotions, and needs.

It’s not about “fixing” us. It’s about meeting us with empathy. Trust me, it will help your communication, your connection, and your relationships tenfold.

Cause here’s the thing: this isn’t us being “crazy.”
It’s biology. It’s hormones. It’s real.

Men — if you’re reading this, please know this knowledge will change your relationships.
Understanding what week of the cycle your partner, sister or a family member is in can help you know when to lean in with softness, when to give space, and when is definitely not the best time for feedback, and when is the time to plan a fun night out!

Even as women, most of us don’t get taught this.
I’m 32 and only learned this in the last two years.

THE BOTTOM LINE IS:

PMS isn’t weakness.
It’s a reminder.
To slow down.
To listen.
To give ourselves grace.

That’s my word this week: grace.

I wrote a few weeks about how we can’t control the winds, but we can adjust our sails. So, I’m choosing to put the anchor down and giving myself a break for rest of today. I pushed through enough today, including writing this letter…

I moved the rest of my meetings today.
Now, I might nap.
I will go on a slow evening walk later.
I will put protein in this body, and then, lots of chocolate. (no shame)

Girlies, we don’t have to fight against this.
We don’t have to hide this.
We just need to honour this.

And we need to talk about this more.

This is part of our hormonal makeup.
I hope. whether you’re a woman going through this or a man witnessing this with women in your life, that this can help us connect with each other even more awareness.

With gentleness,
with honesty,
and with grace.

Love from my moody little nest,
Essi x

PS: Do you feel the PMS shift too? Or notice it in a loved one? Hit reply — I’d love to hear how you navigate it.