My life lately?

A whole lot of behind-the-scenes work, quiet shifts, and course-correcting regarding my business and this community.

Last week, Connected You turned 4. 🎉
If you missed the letter about where we’re heading and how this community has evolved, you can catch up here.

In all honesty, I’ve been in deep introvert mode; hibernating, reflecting, and needing a whole lot of this:

I’ve had so many conversations recently with people feeling burnt out, overwhelmed, or like their energy is riding a rollercoaster. Sound familiar?

Sure, the whole work-life balance thing is important — but I also believe there’s a deeper question worth asking:

👉 Are you an introvert, ambivert, or extrovert?
(And are you honouring that in your day-to-day?)

We often hear a lot about introverts and extroverts, but ambiverts? Not so much.

People tend to call me an extrovert due to my love for being with people and zesty nature.

However, I am actually an ambivert, and I think majority of out there might resonate with this, too.

This might be WHY so many of you feel drained.

FIRSTLY, WHAT IS AN INTROVERT AND EXTROVERT?

Firstly, introverts are those who get energy from being alone. They love working alone and need heads up if a group brainstorming or gathering is coming up. Extroverted people get energy being around people and could be around people both on their good and bad days. They fuel up from people, and can get like this in any environments!

WHAT ABOUT AMBIVERT?

Vanessa Van Edwards is a researcher and body language expert, who says 80% of people are actually ambiverts, folks who fall somewhere in between.

• Balance: Ambiverts enjoy both social interaction and alone time.

• Recharge time: They need more time to recharge after social activities, like introverts.

• Extroverted when energy is right: They can be extroverted in the right circumstances, much like extroverts, but it depends on the energy of the people and environment they are in. When the energy doesn’t align, they can become very introverted in nature.

• Strong points: Ambiverts possess the strengths of both extroverts and introverts, allowing them to be adaptable and thrive in various settings.

• Self-awareness: Understanding their triggers – what boosts and drains their social energy – is important for ambiverts. 

The challenge for us ambiverts is knowing when something no longer energizes us and we must make a change or even end it. We tend to stay in connections longer than others because of our adaptability and thinking that it will work, when in real life it doesn’t energize us.

We don’t want to disappoint people. So we stay. We keep giving.
But some questions are worth asking:

💭 Am I actually enjoying this — or just carrying the energy of the space?
💭 Is this connection giving to me, or only taking from me?
💭 Do I feel lit up after this… or quietly drained?

If that hits home, you’re not alone.

As I write in my book HEARTFUL, the second pillar is Enthusiasm.
You’re meant to feel alive, excited, and energized by what and who you surround yourself with.
When the energy isn’t flowing or aligning — it’s not for you.

So here’s a gentle reminder, especially if you’re an ambivert like me:

✨ It’s either a whole-embodied YES… or it’s a no.

And often when burnout creeps in, it’s because:

• You’ve been “on” too long without rest.

• Your workload is out of sync with your capacity.

• Or you're simply in a space or relationships that just don’t energize you anymore.

Ask yourself:
✨ What lights me up?
✨ Who lights me up when I am with them?

For me, it’s connecting people and storytelling. That’s the thread that runs through everything I do — whether it’s coaching, circles, walks, or content consulting, it’s all about meaningful connection and stories shared.

But it wasn’t always this way. I left my 9–5 in October 2023 because I was burning out, surrounded by the wrong energy, in an environment that just didn’t fit. It drained me.

I hope these personality insights and reflection questions help you reconnect with yourself — so you can make the shifts you need to feel less depleted, and more alive.

Because you deserve to live a life that lights you up.
We all do.

Any other fellow ambiverts out there? Reply to this email and let me know if this resonated and let’s connect. xx

Heartfully,
Essi 🫶

NEXT CONNECTED YOU EVENTS

Connect & Create Club: Natural History Museum
🎨 

A wholesome afternoon to come together to wander through a gallery, sketch, connect and meet like-hearted souls.

Date: Sunday, June 1st
Location: Natural History Museum
Time: 1pm - 4pm
Ticket: £7

👣 Our FIRST EVER Men’s Walk & Talk Club
Hosted by my wonderful friend and Coach Alex Whitton

Not therapy. Not networking. Just walking and talking with other men. Because connection doesn't have to be complicated.

Date: Saturday 14th June
Location: Hyde Park
Time: 11am - 1pm
Tickets: £7

Ladies, invite your partners, brothers, gay besties & guy friends! Let’s build spaces where men can feel safe to connect vulnerably, too.

This is a full circle moment for me. And it feels right.

Women’s Walk & Talk Club in Greenwich: Time is Now!

Not therapy, not networking. Just women supporting women.
Because connection doesn't have to be complicated.

Date: Sunday, 15th June
Location: Greenwich Park
Time: 1:00pm - 4:30pm
Tickets: £7